The World before 9 am

I actually got up and attended Matins this morning, much to my astonishment. And I was incredibly glad for it! Have you been to those worship services where it feels like the lessons, psalms, and music were put together specifically for your renewal? It is quite overwhelming. That was this morning's service for me today. A truly wonderful way to begin a day.
Then, a sentiment at Jenni's journal that echoes most with some of my struggles the last few weeks: I tried not to get caught up in any drama today, one of my friends said the way to survive around here is just to be jaded and distanful. I think that could work in some cases, but that just isn't my life story in Christ. You go, pink lady!

Well, It’s a Start - Ethics I

I have had two nagging questions about this virtue-narrative ethic we have been working out of, both from the Truth book. First, with the emphasis on “radical sensitivity to suffering” that Middleton and Walsh propose as one of two “anti-totalizing” effects in the Biblical Meta-narrative, how do we explain some our (meaning, The Church’s) responsibility for causing others to suffer, whether directly or indirectly? Basically, this is a question about who gets to tell the story – if women had been the primary storytellers, I’m pretty sure we would have had women’s ordination long ago, and maybe (I’m only saying maybe here) we wouldn’t have launched the Crusades. So that’s question one. Question two is connected – How does this model deal with conflicting ideas of the narrative held by people who claim the same narrative? The two ideals that Middleton & Walsh have reduced the Biblical story to are great – but I doubt that everyone who claims the name of Christian would agree. So what are we to do with those disagreements? Luckily, the scholars are a step ahead of me here! Michael Budde begins to address these issues at the end of chapter four in The (Magic) Kingdom of God. He suggests that while the range of Christian stories in not infinite, it does not follow that there is only one version that can or should be told, heard, and lived. (p. 66) Sadly, this is about all Budde has to say on the topic of these criticisms. But he goes on to talk about the importance of passing on, receiving, and living the Christian faith. Maybe the answer is just patience – over time, the narrative will grow as saints are born, live and die. Of course, the answer for me always involves hope – hope that we are continually guided by the Spirit in our doings, and hope that we are able to count ourselves among those saints.

I've added a couple more folks to the links column: Jenni is a another seminarian, and Lizzie is a student at Vassar and a friend from home. Welcome ladies!

Up on the Roof

It has been a good night... we had a sort of improptu Cinco De Mayo party here on the 2nd floor, which was fun. Then Luke & I settled down to watch a bit of Letterman before bed. I was overjoyed to find that Dave has resurrected the activity of throwing things off the roof of the building. Tonight's objects included five five-gallon jugs of water, a bowl of chocolate pudding, and 35 gallons of super balls. When I was a kid, my brother and sister and I would get endless amounts of joy and entertainment in throwing various items down the stairs - stuffed animals, books, our Speak 'N Spell. Once they threw me down, but our parents didn't like that idea... Anyway, I got a lot of stupid giggles out of the Letterman skit and it was a good stress relief.
In other news, I had a CPE interview today. Some of you may remember that I had a CPE site already set... but my orginal first-choice place emailed last week with an open spot. I've been very torn about what to do here, and would appreciate some prayers for clarity in my decision. Muchas gracias, and Happy Cinco de Mayo!

Past, Present & Future

I've had a good weekend so far, which also means I've done pretty much no work. I joined in the celebrations for Trish's 30th birthday, and had a wondeful time. Her play,Heartbreak Waltz, was beautiful and wonderful. Trish was, of course, absolutely amazing. She is truly talented. If you didn't go see the show last Friday, you should go soon. Then, we were off to Tripp's to enjoy Jeff's gumbo and great conversation with great friends. Saturday invovled more friends and fun: walking in the morning with Catherine, Anna, and Jolene, and then grabbing Stephanie to go to the Long Grove Chocolate Festival. Mmmm... chocolate fondue. The festival was actually less about chocolate than I was expecting, but we still had a blast. Luke & I had dinner with Dave and Stephanie too. Stephanie is a really good cook. Yummy day.
I've re-connected (in the online sort of way) with a few friends of mine from home, three women who are finishing their first year of college right about now. Their livejournals have involved some reminiscing and some looking ahead, and a note of frustration at being caught inbetween two worlds. In short, their conversations are really echoing with me. Seminary is quite the liminal place... this crucible of formation means that we are always stuck inbetween something: we're aspirants waiting for postulancy, postulants waiting for candidacy, people away from home, but we may never really go back home. We're not clergy, but we're not longer exactly lay people either. Even today's weather is inbetween: please either rain, or let the sun come out!! Geez. Its always nice to know that I have several friends on the other side of this ordination journey. And, in case they read this, there are plenty of folks on the other side of "college/camp" journey too. Holler if you need us!
But practical things first... I need to go to the store and get milk. Yum, I love milk.

My Night-time Verses

So if anyone is in Christ, there is a new creation: everything old has passed away; see, everthing has become new! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ, and has given us the minsitry of reconciliation - 2 Corinthians 5:17-18


the thin horizon of a plan is almost clear
my friends and i have had a tough time
bruising our brains hard up against change
all the old dogs and the magician
now i see we're in the boat in two by twos
only the heart that we have for a tool we could use
and the very close quarters are hard to get used to
love weighs the hull down with its weight

but the wood is tired and the wood is old
and we'll make it fine if the weather holds
but if the weather holds we'll have missed the point
that's where i need to go

no way construction of this tricky plan
was built by other than a greater hand
with a love that passes all out understanding
watching closely over the journey
yeah but what it takes to cross the great divide
seems more than all the courage i can muster up inside
although we get to have some answers when we reach the other side
the prize is always worth the rocky ride

but the wood is tired and the wood is old
and we'll make it fine if the weather holds
but if the weather holds we'll have missed the point
that's where i need to go

sometimes i ask to sneak a closer look
skip to the final chapter of the book
and then maybe steer us clear from some of the pain it took
to get us where we are this far yeah
but the question drowns in it's futility
and even i have got to laugh at me
no one gets to miss the storm of what will be
just holding on for the ride

the wood is tired and the wood is old
we'll make it fine if the weather holds
but if the weather holds we'll have missed the point
that's where i need to go
-Indigo Girls, The Wood Song